Posts Tagged ‘dying’

Live, Love and Laugh – a guide to Learning to Laugh When You Feel Like Crying

Laugh When You Feel Like Crying by Allen Klein

Welcome to Kala’s Quick Five, where I chat with fascinating authors, artists, teachers and researchers and ask them five questions about their work. My guest today is Allen Klein, the world’s only Jollytologist. Allen has a masters degree in humor (from St. Mary’s College in Minnesota-and that’s no joke!) He is also an award-winning speaker and best-selling author whose first book The Healing Power of Humor is in its 36th printing and ninth foreign language translation. He has written 17 books that all focus on humor as a means to deal with everything from traffic jams to tragedies, and his writing has appeared in four editions of Chicken Soup for the Soul. His new book is: Learning to Laugh When You Feel Like Crying: Embracing Life After Loss.

Kala: Allen, welcome to Kala’s Quick Five. You teach workshops using humor to deal with changes, challenges, and stressful situations. Examples include Humor for Workplace Wellness, and Motivational Humor Presentations for Healthcare and other Professionals. How can one use humor in the workplace effectively without going too far and upsetting someone?

Allen: You are right. Humor in the workplace can be a tricky thing, especially in today’s culture and harassment issues. Still, I think it is possible to lighten up the work environment. First, stop, look, and listen for what kind of humor is acceptable where you work. What do people kid around about? What kind of humor ticks people off? Does the supervisor or the boss set a tone for appropriate humor?

Once you know some of this than you can introduce some light-hearted things everyday. For example, put up a ha-ha bulletin board where workers can post a cartoon a day, funny signs like, “Never wrestle with a pig. You both get dirty and the pig likes it,” or their baby photos for everyone to guess who it is.  Or, you could introduce props on your desk to lighten the day like a jar of bubbles, Groucho glasses, or clown noses that can be used when meetings get too serious.

Kala: You lost your wife to a rare liver disease when she was 34. Near the end, as your wife lay dying in the hospital, you both received a lesson in the therapeutic value of humor. Tell us how you both connected and stayed strong during this time.

Allen: My wife had a copy of Playgirl by the side of her hospital bed and suddenly opened to the male nude centerfold. She insisted that we put it up on the wall. “This is too risque for a hospital” I told her. “Nonsense” she replied, “just take a leaf from that plant over there and use it to cover up his private parts.” I did that and things were fine for the first two days but by the third day the leaf began to shrivel up and reveal more and more of what we were trying to conceal.

After this every time we saw a plant or leaf we both laughed. Our laughter may have been brief and fleeting but it brought us closer together, revived us, and helped us rise above the painful process of her terminal illness and eventual death.

Kala: You’ve worked as a home health aid, hospice volunteer, and director of The Life-Death Transitions Institute in San Francisco. During this time, you gathered your experiences and put them into a book, Learning to Laugh When You Feel Like Crying: Embracing Life After Loss to help others in their journey through loss and grief.  The book is described as a compassionate guide to the bereavement process in which you share the tools and encouragement necessary for transforming loss into a passion for living life to the fullest.  What was the most powerful lesson you learned while working in hospice and assisting with transitions to the other side?

Allen: The biggest lesson I learned from working with dying patients is that death is a natural and necessary part of life. Image, for example, that there were no death. Would you ever get anything done? Probably not because time would never run out. In addition, how would this world feed, shelter and support an ever increasing, never ending, and constant population growth?  Nature shows us with the four seasons that each one is important and how what looks like death in Winter is new growth in Spring.

Kala: Ok, Allen, what’s a Jollytologist and are you the world’s only one? Can others apply to join in on the fun?

Allen: Guess what Kala? I made the word, “Jollytologist” up. Since I studied the therapeutic value of humor for years, technically I’m a “gelotologist.” (Gelos is a Greek work meaning laughter.) But since most people don’t know the word Gelos, I change it to Jolly. Of course, anyone can join in the fun. According to my thinking, anyone can become anything they want. Since I’ve coined the word “Jollytologist,” others have become a Joyologist, a Happyologist, a Funologist, etc. But one word of caution…don’t call yourself a “Jollytologist” because it is Trade Marked.

Kala: Death is a natural part of life that every living being will experience here on earth. What has your work taught you most about the death process and about living?

Allen: I have learned that loss can be one of our greatest teachers. In fact, I’m convinced that we need major setbacks in our life to learn about our strength, our power, and our spirituality. We human beings are funny creatures. We don’t learn much when things are going well. We seem to need a nudge now and then to learn life’s lessons. It is why my book, Learning to Laugh When You Feel Like Crying, has five stages for going from loss to laughter. First we begin with Losing someone or something dear to us. Second we start Learning from that loss.  Third we can move on by Letting Go.  Then, as we put the our loss in the background, we begin Living our life once more. And finally, once we live our life fully, we start Laughing again.

Kala: Allen, thank you for joining me here on Kala’s Quick Five.

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More about Kala Ambrose: Kala Ambrose is an award winning author, wisdom teacher,  inspirational speaker and host of the Explore Your Spirit with Kala Show. Her thought-provoking interviews entice listeners to tune in around the globe! Described by her guests and listeners as discerning, empowering and inspiring, she speaks with world renowned authors, artists, teachers and researchers delving into empowering and lifestyle enhancing topics. More info at ExploreYourSpirit.com



The Soul in Nature

annamaria_hemingwayIn considering the concept of a continuum of consciousness that includes an afterlife, it is important to look to ancient civilizations, such as that of the Egyptians and Greeks, who had no problem in understanding their place in the cosmos. These early ancestors worshipped natural phenomena, such as the sun gods found in most cultures around the globe and believed that they too were part of a constant cosmic cycle of death and renewal. They lived in close harmony with the rhythms of the natural world, in which all forms of animal and plant life were, as they believed, connected. Through observing natural cycles, these people were able to make sense of the mysteries of birth, death and rebirth. They understood the symbolic analogy that nature provided, which enabled them to experience and feel a cosmic, numinous, sacred higher power that guided the workings of the universe. Life was considered to be a continuum of consciousness, controlled by a form of psychic energy that manifested in symbolic metaphors. It was during this period that archetypal divinities made their presence felt in human consciousness.

Nature provided and instilled a feeling of “oneness” with an expanded form of consciousness, because the natural world constantly had – and continues to have – the ability to renew itself and with every death, rebirth follows. This continual process symbolized the eternal life of the soul, and there were many examples. Each evening, the dying sun – often at its most luminous point – descended and set like a golden globe on the horizon. This is the place where the sky meets the earth, and a thin white line symbolizes the thinnest of veils that separates the visible from the invisible world. The moon was also constantly reborn, and renewed itself each month. Similarly, the shore of the ocean was hidden and then exposed by the turn of the unceasing incoming and outgoing tides, and the barren starkness of winter gave way to the reemergence of spring and new life.

As the memories of winter begin to fade and the days become longer, the subtle changes that are taking place in the change of season give us the opportunity to reacquaint ourselves with this ancient wisdom. Through contemplating how the once barren landscape has become full of vibrant new blossom and foliage, we are reminded of the sacred analogy of The Tree of Life, which symbolizes creation, life, and return to the Divine, providing simultaneous images of the microcosm of the Self merging into the macrocosm of the supernatural realm. This metaphor found in many world religions can instill in us a magical sense of connection to the primordial origins and divine roots of human existence.

In his book, Man’s Search for Meaning, Viktor Frankl who was imprisoned for three years in Auschwitz, one of the notorious German concentration camps, illustrates how this sacred connection could still be accessed, even in the most desperate and dire situations. As a doctor, he tried to tend to the sick prisoners and relates how he witnessed the experience of a young woman who was dying in the Nazi camps. Through the window of her hut, she could see a single branch of a chestnut tree that had two blossoms in flower, which comforted her, and she remarked to Frankl:

This tree here is the only friend I have in my loneliness. I often talk to this tree…It said to me, ‘I am here – I am life, eternal life.’

In modern-day Western society, sacred communion to the natural world barely exists, as the ability to maintain our relationship and sense of wonder with these symbolic images is no longer a part of human consciousness. We now try to control the forces of nature, for example: we attempt to clone life forms, and genetically modify crops and consequently view ourselves as set apart, rather than as being a part of the teeming life force of the planet. As a result, the ability to connect with our Divine legacy has been lost, and people are unaware of and unable to recognize the archetypal images that manifest all around them.

Unfortunately, the voice of the natural world and its divinities can no longer be heard. Swiss Psychiatrist, C.G. Jung described people as only being able to refer to a belief, because they had lost this primordial understanding. Jung lamented that today’s people no longer experience sacred connection to the natural world, and have no understanding of the real world that is alive in rivers, oceans, mountains and nature in general. As a result, they live their lives in exile, with only unconscious stirrings to remind them of their true purpose and ultimate destiny. In his book, The Earth has a Soul, Jung states: “Man feels himself isolated in the cosmos. He is no longer involved in nature and has lost his participation in natural events…his immediate communication is gone forever, and the emotional energy it generated has sunk into the unconscious.”

However, as we approach the oncoming spring solstice and can celebrate the spiritual meaning of Easter, which in Western traditions is symbolized through the death and resurrection of Christ, we also have the opportunity to journey inwards and reconnect with the powerful, symbolic imagery provided by the natural world to reflect on how rebirth in nature also powerfully symbolizes our hope of resurrection. This capacity for renewal was also illustrated through world mythology, for the ancient vegetation gods, such as the Greek god, Adonis, died during the summer solstice, as the sun descended in the west into the depths of winter and crossed the threshold into the darkness of the underworld. Fertility goddesses from many other cultures such as the Norse goddess, Idun, made similar underworld journeys. But although “death” claimed them for a while, at the winter solstice, the gods and goddesses were believed to reappear in the sky, when the returning sun commenced its journey in the south and heralded the promise and stirrings of regeneration.

Through meditating on these ancient myths and primordial images, we can recognize once more the soul in nature and remember that our own soul is merely clothed in the physical body, and emanates from the same life force that is visible everywhere in the natural world. This understanding can enable us to live life with a sense of purpose and meaning – as a joyful celebration of our existence – and help us become fully involved in the practice of conscious living and dying.

practicing-conscious-living-72dpi_91_140More about Annamaria Hemingway….

Annamaria Hemingway MA (ABD) is the author of Practicing Conscious Living and Dying, published by O Books. She is also a spiritual counselor and member of the International Association of Near-Death Studies. More info at: www.practicingconsciouslivinganddying.com

Kala and Annamaria Hemingway discuss her book Practicing Conscious Living and Dying on The Explore Your Spirit with Kala Show.  Listen in the archives here: http://exploreyourspirit.com/Media/shows3.shtml#HEMINGWAY



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Humanity is entering a new era...we are evolving into super-powered beings of light. Our auric and etheric bodies are experiencing a transformational shift as new crystalline structures form within and around our auras.

Kala Ambrose, a powerful wisdom teacher, intuitive, and oracle, teaches how to connect with your rapidly changing energy body to expand your awareness and capabilities on the physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual levels.

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The Awakened Aura: Experiencing the Evolution of Your Energy Body contains a wealth of practical exercises, diagrams, and instructions. Learn how to interpret and work with the auras of others, sense energy in animals, and sense and balance the energy in buildings and natural locations.Discover how energy cords attach in relationships, how to access the akashic records through the auric layers, how to use elemental energy to enhance your auric field, and much more. More info at TheAwakenedAura.com

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Explore haunted lighthouses, forts, and shipwrecked areas of East Carolina where Blackbeard and his pirates still roam as you join author and paranormal researcher Kala Ambrose in Ghost Hunting North Carolina.

Journey across the state and visit the most actively haunted capitol in the US, and continue west into the Blue Ridge Mountains where the pink lady and her friends await your presence. Maps and travel information are provided to every haunted location for those brave enough to make the journey in person and for paranormal researchers who are interested in exploring haunted North Carolina.

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Kala's book, 9 Life Altering Lessons: Secrets of the Mystery Schools Unveiled, delves into the teachings of ancient Egypt and Greece and explains the Mystery Schools and their ventures into the other realms.

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